she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Its about making memories worth repressing
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
