did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
