no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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