My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
