Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
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