Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize