Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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