We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
