just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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