No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
My bed is full of blood and feathers
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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