I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
