You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
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