I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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