32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize
