just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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