Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
