And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
