So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
