i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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