Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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