Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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