yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He better not be in your backpack
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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