why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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