Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
This is the high leading the old right now
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
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