He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
