everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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