it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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