there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
