right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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