an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
