we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
