i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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