It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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