it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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