Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
