you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
is that a dick in a sweater?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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