he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
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