I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
