i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize