there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Is Oprah even human
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
