i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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