I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
please don't ironically join a cult
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