wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
