I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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