Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Randomize
