Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize