So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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