either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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