I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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