If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
