wakey wakey hands off snakey
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
